For as long as I can remember, I’ve tried to wrap my head around how to best feel fulfilled. Nurturing my soul- finding the things that bring me joy, ignite my passions, challenge and push me- is rarely difficult. Once one project is finished I’m jumping to the next. I know exactly where to find laughter. I’m constantly moving and grooving around. My mind is almost always full, and if it isn’t, I have no problem finding a way to feed it the nutrients it needs.

In all this searching to cultivate a nurtured mind, I must have forgotten that my body needs, and deserves, some generosity as well. Filling my body with something, anything, recently fell to the bottom of a long list of priorities. And slowly, neglecting my body’s needs made it impossible to fulfill my mind’s desires.

Nourish. For the past seven nights I have sketched this word using the foods that have provided me the energy I need each day. Creating and carrying these drawings reminds me that feeding my body is not a sin, but a responsibility and a privilege. It will be a long process and a continuous practice, but I am, gratefully, starting to learn how to nourish my body and mind, equally.


January 24

cold toes lead to warm toes

           and grateful I have ten

snowy Sundays at home reminding

           of possibilities of bigger

           things and grateful I have dad

colored pencils and coconut milk

           keep me smiling while times with

           familiar faces are virtually


don’t play football and wishing I could

           but soon


January 25

grateful: Gatorade, crochet, pencils, warm water, meal plans


January 26

joy in my chest, not discomfort, not numbness

sitting with the weight of gratitude


trouble feeling/filling nourished

disappointed cleanliness and the three mud pies

           sit in my body


January 27

striving to erase (messily) the material that once made up my person


pushing myself to be grateful for my flesh and allowing myself to feel comfortably full as a woman


knowing I will have two arms and two legs with which to move


wishing for comfortable vulnerability


January 28

brown fills up the page and

           the body

but looks good on neither

wanting more color, more flexibility

and trying to remember

more is not bad


January 29

grateful: colored pencils, boogie woogie, blankets, granola recipes, movement


January 30

and the three munchkins reappeared

           in the best form imaginable

lucky to have them, lucky to have this

slipping and falling but the ground always catches me


a complete understanding that is

           not full,

relatable and maybe not healthy

sometimes distraction is the

best form of nourishment

but only sometimes

Kate WeinerComment